he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
