We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
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