No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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