Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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