My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
