I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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