I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
