It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
