Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
I intend to get homeless drunk
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
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