I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
