Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
