How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize
