Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize