but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
