Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
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