the new term for farting is butt boxing.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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