Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
