their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
In America we eat man semen.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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