I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
its not stalking. its research.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
