so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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