I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
