I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
