I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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