Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize
