dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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