yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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