Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
