Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize
