i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
