She's JV to your varsity
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
