so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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