We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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