Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
