Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
When did angry sex become our thing?
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
