You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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