Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
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