would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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