My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize