So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize
