What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
