you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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