i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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