so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
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