Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize