Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
