Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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