this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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