I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
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