things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Send help, water and tortillas.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
