Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
I woke up under a house in Key West
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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